June 12, 2007
Every single day, Runner's World Magazine sends me a quote. These awe-inspiring quotes are intended to be highly motivational and should provide me with the daily desire to push myself to new limits of personal fitness. Well, they don't. Mostly because they're stupid.
When I signed up for the quote-a-day service, I was hoping for quotes like this:
"You have an unbelievably nice ass."
"Wow, running has turned you into the spitting image of Julia Roberts."
Instead, I get quotes like this:
"Pain is temporary. Pride is forever."
or today's quote...
"You have a choice. You can throw in the towel, or you can use it to wipe the sweat off of your face." -Gatorade
Today's quote is wrong--all wrong. Probably the stupidest yet. I have far more choices about what to do with a towel than the two that Gatorade is presenting. For example, I could take the towel to the lake and work on my tan. I could use the towel to replace my current, freak-nasty bathmat. I could wrap myself in the towel so I that I don't have to walk to the mailbox half-naked like I usually do. Or, I could use the towel to make a fantastic handicraft project like the one pictured above--that way I could hang the towel on the handle of my oven door, and if I ever do feel like using it to wipe the sweat off of my face, I'll know right where I left it.
I feel quite strongly that today's quote should be changed. It should probably read:
"You have a choice. You can throw in the towel, or if it happens to feature a screen-printed image of a kitten wearing a scarf, you might consider tastefully crocheting the top part of it (among other options)."
That just seems to make so much more sense to me. And if anyone from the quote departmentof Runner's World is reading this, here's my daily quote for you...
"If at first you don't suceed, try try again."