Here's what I would like to know: When did it become socially acceptable to bring dogs inside of buildings? You know...shopping malls, restaurants, schools, town hall, et cetera.
I'm a dog owner myself, so it's not as though I have a problem with the canine species, I'm just shocked with the sheer volume of these creatures. It used to be that every now and again you'd see some crazy lady pushing her dog--who happened to be dressed like Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz--through Costco in a baby stroller. But lately, this dog-inside-of-buildings phenomenon has simply exploded.
I honestly think I've seen more dogs at town hall in the last week than I've seen on the Animal Channel. They've ranged from a Yorkie in a hand bag, to a hot dog wearing a cable knit sweater, to a Bull Mastiff whose tail had the same circumference as a coffee can. Usually, I think it's funny when Alex the Poodle trots by my desk, but today I really wasn't feeling the fluffy love.
Around nine o'clock this morning, a very stinky lady came into my office with a very stinky Chihuahua. If you want me to be quite honest, I thought the dog was straight-up repulsive, but in an effort to maintain my reputation as a loving human being I looked at the animal and said something goofy like, "Hi little guy." Well, apparently this creature was very interested in making new friends, because in one half of one second I found him sitting in my lap, horrible breath and all. As my cube-mate doubled-over in laughter, the Chihuahua hopped from my lap to my desk, and stood there happily as his owner conducted business with the permit coordinator.
I swear to high-heaven that Mr. Giggles (or whatever his name was) just stood on my stack of file folders and stared me in the face for several long minutes. I can lie, he really was entertaining. I wonder if he thought my co-worker and I were entertaining, too, with our periodic comments like, "I bet that I could fit in my file drawer." and "Are you afraid of heights?" and "I wonder if you would like to try flying."
Later in the day, I received a call from the state--a call I've been waiting for since two Tuesday's ago. Four minutes into our conversation, the noise level in our office was so elevated that I had to put my caller on hold and investigate the source of the ruckus. I don't know what I expected to find--a middle aged man who had fallen into quicksand, perhaps? But no, no. It was actually a basset hound and a bull dog who were engaged in all-out ruff n' tumble war in the lobby.
I guess I can't blame those dogs. If some one sniffed my rear while I was waiting in line for a building permit, I would have cause a commotion, too.