Deep Thoughts by James

August 11, 2008

A few months ago I bought James a package of pocket-sized cards that depict a variety of monumental religious events. You know--Moses parting the Red Sea, Noah petting an elephant, Paul falling off of his horse--the works.

When I bought the cards, I was hoping they'd keep James silent and reverent during the quiet parts of church. Also, little religious cards throw out a much better image than, I don't know, a smoking cap gun...or a talking Jay Jay the Jet Plane book...or half a pound of deli meat. I know this first hand, as each one of those items has fallen out of James's backpack and onto the pew at one time or another.

Please take a moment and try to imagine my embarrassment when I had to forcibly wrestle a package of thinnly sliced honey ham from my three-year-old's hands during the opening prayer.

But yesterday morning, my plan went off without a hitch. James sat quietly, sifting through his card collection, occasionally pausing to tap me on the shoulder and excitedly whisper his own pictorial description into my ear--"Mom. Yook. It's Cheeeesus. He es usin' a coupon ta save some money."

Close enough, James. Close enough.

When James eventually came to a picture of the crucifixion, his eyes widened, his mouth fell into a frown, and with a great measure of concern in his voice, James said, "Dis is twoubo (trouble). Der is a yot of twoubo in dis one, Mom. Twoubo."

Out of the corner of my eye, I watched the middle-aged woman behind me place her hand over her heart and slowly shake her head back and forth as if to say, "Wow. What a sweet, sweet child. He must have an excellent mother."

Then, James put his cards down on the pew, turned around to face the congregation, and clearly said, "Someday, when I am maweed (married) I well be in twoubo aw of de time. A yot of twoubo."

Not surprisingly, the middle-aged woman behind us though that line was even cuter than the first.


Jodie said...

LOL! Man, kids do say the greatest things. Someday James will be 'just so glad' you saved all this about him.

littlebee said...

Oh James, you are awesome. I can't wait until this story is shared at your wedding... :)

Amy said...

Smart kid.

Our Little World said...

What a cutie!

Heather said...

Wise beyond his years!

Grandma said...

he's too smart for 3!

Heather said...

James truly is awesome. He rules.

Maraiya said...

Who knew that James was psychic?