Desperately Seeking Something

November 11, 2008

Maybe you haven't noticed, but for the first time in two years, I have a raging case of writer's block--like a bumpy, oozing, infected case. Very hard to treat with antibiotics.

I can't tell you how many times I've opened my Blogger template, just to let out a frustrated huff and click my laptop shut in defeat as I reach for another Oreo cookie.

James's daycare is closed today--so sometime around noon I loaded him into the station wagon and headed out to meet Jared for lunch. As we sat at our favorite table in our favorite barbeque joint, I searched my head for ideas over a heaping plate of pulled pork. Because of my wordlessness, Jared was concerned.

We talked for a few minutes about my block, and my ever loving husband--the wonderful man that he is--offered up idea, after idea, after idea. Unfortunately they were things like, "You could write about trout!" or "What about fly tying?" or "I know! You should tell about that fishing trip I took to Oklahoma that time...."

"Or I could write about my plans for my second wedding," I said. "I'm definitely having this place cater it."

He got the idea.

So, in this dessert-like time of desperation, how 'bout helping a girl out?

Do you have a non-lame (that part is very important) post idea for The Lawsons did Dallas? Is there anything you've ever wanted to know about me (eg shoe size, hip measurement, those old college stories)? Are there pictures you want me to post (more light fixtures that resemble teets, our wood pile that's the size of Los Angeles, the scummy shiz that's stuck behind my bathroom faucet)?

If you have any ideas, requests, or suggestions, please send me an email or leave them in the comments. I'll be more than happy to oblige.
There's only one rule: You're not allowed to be all whiny if I don't use your idea. Whining is for fart lickers, not sexy grown-ups.

Oh, and yes, I know. I haven't posted James's halloween pictures yet. The files are acting all stubborn and screwed-up (just like me from the age of 16 to 20). I think I'm gonna have to re-dress him up, snap a few pics, and them post them. Please be aware: I still haven't sent out my 2007 Christmas letters, so all of you Hallo-wieners will have to exercise your patience.

And, as always, thanks for using your brilliant minds to contribute to such a worthy cause!

29 comments:

littlebee said...

What about that ticket stub I found in the pants you gave me? Tell the story of that ticket's journey into my jewelry box.

Oh! I know! I have a ton of quirky writing prompts I use with my kids. I'll email you some! :)

Sarah said...

I was very entertained by the couple of posts you wrote about the strange/inappropriate pictures you used to doodle when you were little! So how about more stories about you as a little girl?

Laura said...

I like Sarah's idea, and am also all for hearing the college stories. I have a feeling they too will be strange/inappropriate, which is exactly my level of humor :)

RazZDoodle said...

are you kidding me? I've got my own problems over here! Whatever you don't use, I will!

Helen said...

I want a photo tour of that little town of yours! I know--you're trying not to give out too much info but I don't need your latitude and longitude--just a few pics of those crazy places (and sights) we're always hearing about!

Heather said...

How about thoughts on the election? Thoughts about Thanksgiving coming up? Funny holiday stories? Favorite holiday things that make your Thanksgiving? Yes it sounds hallmarky, but it could be funny.

Cheryl said...

I'm curious to know what James said when he saw your parents in those anatomically correct cow costumes.? Since he's three, I figure he must have had something profound or hilarious to say.

Emily Murdock said...

I'd love to know about your worst break-up. I have a feeling that time has made it reeeeeealy funny.

Kate said...

Please, for the love of cheese doodles post more of your childhood drawings and the stories that go along with them!!

Grandma said...

Why do car care/problems come to mind? Are your tires low?

vkrem1dm said...

I love your drawings and strongly suspect I would be entertained by wedding stories, both yours and ones you've attended.

How about strangest presents you've given to family or friends?

Katherine said...

I thoroughly enjoyed hearing about your tattoo's, what they were and what they are now. I don't think I ever heard you tell it though, I think I heard about them from Sarah.

Mrs Furious said...

I got nothing for you. I find making random videos of me in the kitchen tides me over until I actually have something to write ;)

But I did need to tell you that Mr F, Baby & I went to a BBQ joint for lunch today... and had the pulled pork.
Take it in.

HotMommy said...

I liked the blog about your trip to/guilt about tripping to Wal-Mart.

I'm betting there are more interesting visits to chain stores in general that could yield amusement.

More so than that last uptight sentence....

HotMommy said...

Last uptight sentence that I wrote. Your writing is NEVER uptight. Very loosey goosey. In a good way. Breezy.

Keli said...

Not having been a reader of yours for too long, I have a few ideas, but you may have already covered them.

How bout your wedding/honeymoon days?

Maybe the car you drive and why?

The contents of your junk drawer, or in my case drawer(s).

Just a thought.

A said...

first i must say, you are hilarious. i found your blog, believe it or not, when i googled 'best blogs'. aren't you something! my sons name is also james and is the humor behind some of my blogs. so how about you tell of the most memorable embarrassing moment brought to you by James...or your husband, or even yourself. thanks also for being so honest in moments of despair, i love it and appreciate it.

Alisha said...

The most amazing thing I have ever read on a blog was your post on Jared's unconventional use of deodorant. Any more stories like that? Otherwise, let's see more drawings.

Laura said...

I'm totally all about those old college stories you've mentioned once or twice. Seems like there could be some very good, and very easy material in there, if you're willing to share!

Charlotte said...

I'm all for childhood drawings & college stories.

I'd also love to hear about how you met Jared (maybe I missed that some million posts ago- rehash it, in that case). Include highlights from your courtship/engagement.

I love hearing the things James says- with your translations.

Horrible holiday memories, grade school nightmares, worst date ever...

I'm sure you'll come up with something great.

J~Mom said...

Did you sell the Blazer? I want to hear more about 16-20!! Favorite stores to shop and not shop? Any funny shops in town there? Marathon goals?

VICKI IN AZ said...

So... Amy, tell us about being a Mormon living in Maine. It is a little different from being a Mormon living in Mesa, AZ. Vicki

Sue said...

Dang, I was coming over her to steal a post idea from YOU. I have absolutely nothing to blog about. less than nothing. The nothingest.

Michemily said...

My suggestion would be to go to new areas you haven't been to before and take pictures of anything and everything. Then write about them.

Iggy Bloggit said...

you don't have to do a post about this (unless there's a story to tell) but i've wondered, have you always been a Mormon or did you convert?

i also agree drawings (childhood or brand-spankin-new) are a golden fallback!

Mindy said...

I know 99.9% of the population finds this subject boring, but I am amused by your running stories. Do you ever run anymore? Hmmm... me neither. ;)

The Roberts' Report said...

I personally like your stories that involve:
-cutting your own hair
-Jared being lame
-Jared breaking the law
-your drawings as a child
-your obsession with naked bodies as a kid
-also you could throw in some good ol' fashion holiday traditions!

chattypatra said...

Why don't you blog about the first time you put yourself in Jared's hands for an adjustment? I remember how much I freaked out the first time a chiropractor cracked my neck!

Joy Through Cooking said...

yeah more funny running stories! Like peein in the woods (or during a race when you lose all control. or is that just me?) or fallin off a treadmill... or or or...

Would love college/childhood stories and more drawings :) Stories of being courted could be excellent.