How'd They do That?
June 22, 2007

So I got a voicemail from my sister today. It said something to this effect:

"...Amy. My kid is cute, isn't he? I know I'm his mother, so I probably think he's a little cuter than most people, but I'm pretty sure he's at least normal looking. Anyway, I took him to Sear's to get his portrait done, and he looks crazy in those pictures. How could they make my baby look strange, Amy? Why did I pay them to make Tyler look so bad?"

I deleted the message, hung up the phone and kind of giggled to myself. My nephew Tyler is a very, very attractive child. I figured that my sister was simply acting as an overly picky consumer--a little stage-mommish if you will. And then I saw the pictures.


Katy wasn't overreacting. According the the proofs I viewed online, this photographer definitely has the ability to make Barbie herself look like a Cabbage Patch Kid...all chunky, and yarn-haired, and buck-toothed. Just look at that picture of my normally dashing nephew.

I can just picture it. The photographer was probably like, "Mmmm....let me just focus this lens, and turn this light a little bit to the left, and...voila! The perfect picture!" Then he enthusiastically turned to my sister and said, "Ma'am, I managed to capture your child just beautifully. His ears appear to be two inches lower than normal, his hair is ever so spiky, and his chin resembles a three cheeked monkey bum." And I'm sure my kind-hearted sister was extremely complimentary and overly polite about the whole experience.

Poor photographer--he should seriously consider the idea of transferring to the hardware department at Sear's. I bet he'd be good at mixing paint.

Oh, and here's some proof that my nephew really is a looker--


Anonymous said...

ROFL I JUST told Katy that I go to Walmart for pics. We all told her Tyler looks cute and he does. Even a bad photographer couldn't make him look bad.
from IV

Patty said...

Tell your sister it's not Tyler, it's the amateur photographer. I made that mistake ONCE when I went to JC Penney. Those "professional pics" were the worst pics taken of my little baby in his whole 6 months of life. =) And you know I had to purchase the damn pics, because at that point you feel obligated. ggggrrrrr..... still makes me made just thinking about it. hehe.

Grandma said...

Katy was laughing when she called me right after she left Sears...I thought they were shorthanded and sent someone over from the Craftsman tool dept. that day...Tyler -tell everyone your chin is not rumply like that!!!