Thoughts on Adulthood and Hall-of-Fame Moms

August 4, 2008

Despite my chronic overuse of the word "poop" and my occasional references to partial nudity, I really am a grown-up. I have a husband, I have a house, I have a kid, and I have a car. I pay my own cell phone bill, I cook from scratch almost every night, and the sad state of my ass forced me stop wearing thong underwear many, many years ago.

See? I'm a total and complete grown-up.

That's why I was so surprised when I found myself alone in my living room, sobbing like a cartoon moose at four o'clock in the morning, feverishly typing an email to my mother. It went something like this:

SUBJECT: I really, really need my Mom!!!!!

MESSAGE:
Hey Mom...
I need your help so bad. James's daycare was closed all of last week and I "worked" from home. Except I got nothing done. And I have a huge meeting tomorrow morning where I'm supposed to discuss all of my recent accomplishments. That would be okay, except I don't have any recent accomplishments. And James's daycare is closed again this week, so I really don't think I can achieve any notable accomplishments today.
It's raining, our TV is broken, and I know I'll have to spend all day in a tent in the basement pretending to be an angry bear. And seriously Mom, that's not an accomplishment I can talk about at tomorrow morning's meeting.
Mom, I'm crying and worrying and just freaking out over here. I'm supposed to work part-time, and be a great mom, and help Jared at his work, and cook dinner, and clean up after people--and let me tell you, I totally blow at all of it right now.
I only slept for three hours last night and my brand new purse smells like poop.
I love you,
Amy

Within two hours my mother and sister, the kind-hearted superstars that they are, had worked out a plan.

Jared met my sister--who drove up from the South of Boston--at a parking lot in Southern Maine. She drove James to her house where my mother will pick him up and bring him back to her place. From there, James will spend the next few days playing at the beach, eating soft-serve ice cream, and manipulating the heck out of my parents.

I guess you could call it a win, win, win situation.

But for some reason, despite the all-around fabulousness of the scenario, I feel like a big, fat, loser of a mother. Probably because I now have concrete proof that I can't do everything, flawlessly, at the very same time.

Now don't get me wrong here--I know that I'm not a loser, but deep down I still still feel like a first-class loser. But I know I'm not a loser. Even though I kind of am.

That makes sense, right?

Either way, I'm unbelievably grateful to have my mom and my sister and I hope they know how much I appreciate their help this week--because I'm seriously, seriously stretched too thin right now.

Don't ever let anyone tell you that adulthood is easy, because that my friends, is a bold faced lie. I've been a grown-up for a few years now, and take a look at me--I WANT MY MOM!!!!

14 comments:

heather of the EO said...

I often think about how my head would certainly explode if I had to work outside the home on top of this mom and wife and house and dog and life thing. Kudos. Really, I mean that.

I call myself a late bloomer because I really have pretended as long as I could that I am NOT a grown-up.

So glad your mom and sister could help.

Grandma said...

Oh please...happy to do it, plus we get James for a few days! This time he's off to experience mini-golf, however I know he will have more success at it than I will. Take care and have a good week. Accomplishments? You? Want me to fax the list?!!! xoxo

Melanie J said...

I'm "working" part-time as a writer. "Working" because I haven't acutally been paid yet. But I'm in the last week of my manuscript, and four days before a two week Alaskan vacation. I feel as bad as you do. Maybe worse because it's a self-imposed deadline. My house is a wreck and my eight month old is fussing. I should be writing. I should be cleaning. I should be cajoling my kid. At least you picked your kid over your job. I picked blogging! On the grounds that it keeps me sane. As if!

Grandma said...

p.s. even when you're upset, you manage to give the clear image of the hysterical cartoon mouse. Would it be Pixie, Dixie, Mighty, or Minnie?

The Roberts' Report said...

Gosh Amies, you're starting to sound like that Blonde, Gay guy on Design Star that got voted off a few weeks back. He was totally blubbering for his mom too. ;)
You aren't a loser. Just one bad week. Right. Now go use that gift card from your hubby!!

Marathon Maritza said...

You are most definitely NOT a loser. A person cannot be expected to do everything all the time. Good for you for recognizing you needed a bit of help (I think that makes you even MORE of a grown-up,) and what a great thing to have such a supportive family.

(long-time lurker comin' out for some support!)

Amy said...

Thanks guys. I'm feeling a lot better now. I don't know...maybe the carrot cake helped :o)

TUWABVB said...

I think you could only be a loser if you didn't ask for help. Winners know their limitations - and to be honest, who doesn't need their mom every now and then. Moms live for that moment, don't they? I love that you have a family that just jumped right in to help - and from what I have read, you are a WONDERFUL mother and wife (and you don't even sugar-coat things on your blog).

Don't lose faith in yourself honey - I'm having a hard time doing 1/2 of what you are!

Luke and Katie said...

Ok, I AM DYING HERE!! YOU are HILARIOUS! I found your blog from my cousin Codi's blog and seriously haven't stopped laughing yet! So, if you don't mind, I'll stay around for a while and keep reading...

Mindy said...

I think when we're GRANDMAS we will get to be the "perfect mom". See... it worked out with your mom... she's now a perfect mom. So, wait, your time to shine will come!

Michemily said...

Wow, I guess that's one reason to live relatively near my mom some day. Some day, I said.

Heather said...

I still need my mommy all the time. And sometimes when I'm feeling weird about still needing her, I remember that when 9.11.01 happened, Laura Bush (hardly a role model for me, but whatevs) said the first thing she wanted was her mommy.

MorseyRuns said...

As someone who measures their worth by how much people need them- I loved getting calls from my sister in law when they all had gastro and needed help- even if it meant I had gastro later that week- it still meant I was needed and I am massively needy. If only you lived in Australia.........

chattypatra said...

I miss my Mom too, Amy. Wish I could be where she is.