Well it's a good thing I have this ridiculous belly to draw the attention away from that make-upless face and the big, furry box on my head. Seriously, who's gonna be like, "Girl! You need a hair cut!" when they can be like, "Girl! Pick your stomach up this instant, it's dragging all over the sidewalk!"?
As of yesterday, I've officially placed myself into the "full blown spectacle" category.