A Zillionteen Hundred

December 28, 2010

After a Thursday off from work, Christmas over the weekend, and the first blizzardy wallop of the season, I'm completely confused as to what day it is. It kind of feels like Monday and Friday humped and had a strange and confusing baby called Plurshday. So really, Happy Plurshday you guys!

I don't know about you, but I had a really great Christmas. James is still buying the Santa story hook, line, and sinker, which made Christmas morning a jillion times more magical for all of us. When I walked around the corner into the dining room at 6:45, he was standing in the middle of the living room facing the tree. I peered in, trying my best to maintain my fly-on-the-wall-ness, and I could see his hands shaking from excitement. Honestly, they were shaking so hard he could barely hang on to his stocking.

Cute freaking overload.

Aside from a fabulous vacation, or a new car, or plastic surgery, or free groceries for a year, or instantly bigger boobs, it was the best present any mother could ever wish for.

Maggie got a baby doll, and I'm thrilled to say that she's already whipping it around my the ankles and tossing it down the laundry chute. Have I written about how much I love it when little girls commit inadvertent acts of physical abuse on their baby dolls? Because I do. Nothing, and I mean nothing, makes me smile so much.

We were on a tight holiday budget this year, so Jared got a book about fish--I know, how lame. Anyone else would have cried, but thankfully, Jared gets all starry-eyed when he glances at a picture of a trout. I got some new cake pans, some measuring spoons, and a really huge ass. I'm trying to return the ass, but I have no receipt and it's turning out to be pretty complicated--I'll probably bake a red velvet instead.

James told me, that on a scale of one to ten, he'd give this Christmas a zillionteen-hundred. Funny, because that's the same number I picked!

3 comments:

Karen said...

Geez, did every woman get a great big ass for Christmas?

Melissa said...

If you figure out how to return the big ass, please let me know. I will be eternally grateful!

bostonblacksheep said...

Huh, I got the big ass for Christmas, too. Is this the new snuggie? Or is it an accessory *to* the snuggie? Hrm. Either way, I'd like to return both, please. Maybe we should have one person stand at the service desk and have someone else call in -- maybe that will work! ;)