Makes a Bad Day Good

January 27, 2011

Ya know. I'm just having a day. One of those days where the craptastitude completely overshadows the fabulosities of being alive. I really, really hate days like today.

Sometimes, when I stop and think about it, I have a lot going on my life. But please don't get me wrong, for a person like me, that's a good thing. For some reason--and I honestly don't know why--I thrive when I have a zillion balls in the air. When I think back to my undergrad days, there was only one semester that I landed myself a 4.0 GPA. It also happened to be the semester that I was taking 21 credit hours, working two jobs, and planning my wedding.

Blamo. Nailed it. Four. Point. Oh.

These days, I've got a lot going on, and just like the good old days, I really seem to like it. The calendar on my phone is jammed full of business meetings, crazy hat days, road races, dates with Jared, sit-downs with the accountant, and I really, really feel happy with the way my life is shaping up.

But just because I like it, doesn't mean that everything is always going well.

To help you understand the triumphs and vicissitudes of my life, I drew you a super scientific graph. Actually, it's so scientific, that it has legend to go with it, too.

As you can see, when one thing, for example motherhood, is unbelievably good, something else, like work, might be a complete and utter shizfest. And when I'm rockin' the whole 'awesome marriage' bit, chances are, I'm constipated as all get out.

Very rarely do all the forces work together for good. And very rarely, as evidenced by the big black circle on the graph, do all the forces line up to kick me in the front teeth.

Guess where they're lined up today?

Right. In the circle. Sucker punching me over, and over, and over.

Thankfully, at 3:45, the world will tip back up onto its axis, and I won't care about the stupid, stupid, bad stuff. Take a look:

I've finally, after thirty long years, found something on this planet that's more fun than skiing....WATCHING MY KID SKI!

Skiing might be an expensive hobby, but if I die with one dollar in the bank and a whole mess of kids and grandkids who love to ski, I really won't give a damn.

So listen up you crappy poopfest of a day. At 3:45, you can get right out of my way. James is going skiing.


Mindy said...

I love your graph. Love it. I want to steal it.

funderson said...

HA! So true about the skiing. Seeing my boy rip it up is pretty much the best ever.

Pam @ said...

Your graph seriously cracked me up. Fantastic.

Grandma said...

that graph makes so much sense!!!! xo

Karen said...

In the spring, try watching your kid play T-ball. It's just as much fun.

Turi Becker said...

The statistician in me has to note that the line on that graph with the lowest high point is bowel function...

Cheryl said...

Awesome! I missed this post at first, but saw the great pictures of James getting ski lessons. I love your thing about a dollar in the bank, etc.! You crack me up. :-)

Michelle Glauser said...

I think that graph should become my new background.