September 3, 2007
My running watch stopped working a few months ago. It probably just needs a new battery, but taking into account that it was leaving a strange fungus on my wrist, I decided it was good as dead.
I really haven't minded running watchless. In fact, it's been quite liberating. You see, when I wear my watch, I can't pretend I'm not average. But when I don't wear my watch I can fool myself into thinking that the homeless man pushing the grocery cart is my fierce Kenyan competitor and I'm edging him out to win the title. It feels awesome.
As happy as I was to run without a watch, I have a time goal for my marathon, so I figured I should jump into reality and purchase one. So that's what I did tonight, Jared and I went to Target and we bought the very best running watch that ten dollars could buy. It does nothing.
When we arrived at the watch section, I immediately skipped over the ladies' models and began looking at the big men's watches. I admired them, I compared them, I tried them on. I had lined up my three favorites when Jared walked over to see if I had found anything good. He took one look at the watches and asked,
"Amy, why do you want to get a men's watch. They're totally huge!"
"Because, Jared, I like big watches."
"Why?" he demanded, "they're so big!"
"Well" I sheepishly replied, "I like big watches because they make me feel skinny....just like overstuffed furniture and large print books."
And now, I'm happy to say, I'm the proud new owner of the largest watch I could possibly find and I feel SO good about myself.