Second Place

May 2, 2008

James started part-time daycare this week, and so far so good. Actually, it's so great that I haven't experienced the slightest twinge of irrational-mommy-guilt. I suppose I should mention that I feel incredibly guilty for not feeling guilty. But I don't think that really counts.

So far, I only have one reservation with the 16-hour a week arrangement, and I won't mince words here folks: James seems to like his daycare provider far more than he likes me. I've always assumed that moms were reluctant to use childcare in fear that the babysitter might run exotic experiments on their child (or something along those lines). This whole loving-Miss-Nancy-more-than-I-love-my-mother issue never even graced my mind.

Yesterday when I picked James up, Miss Nancy glided to the door with her usual smile and halo, turned to James and exclaimed, "James! Look who's here."

And in a super casual 'I prefer Cheetos' kind of way, James said, "Uh no. I not go wit my Mommy. I not go home. I jus tay wit my fweinds."

It was his fourth day at Nancy's house, and it was the fourth time I heard that very same line. Needless to say, it was getting a little old. So old in fact, that I had to fight the urge to rip off my t-shirt, point to my stretch-marked stomach and say, "You did this to me. It was totally worth it. Now get your afro in the station wagon." If he does it again today, I swear on my uncle's monkey, I'm gonna wanna flash my dimpled-up butt cheeks--you know, just to drive the point home.

I've heard there's an old lady in town who does a lot of babysitting. Supposedly, when the kids act up she makes them sit in the corner and listen attentively as she reads the super freaky seven-headed dragon story from the Book of Revelations.

I might see if she's available tonight.


The Roberts' Report said...

I think you're filled with a little thing I like to call...JEALOUSY! Just wait until she has to put him in time out or get after him to wash his hands and soon he'll hate her as much as he hates...oops sorry. ;) Kids are great!

Bertie said...

LOL! I say send him to the old lady!!:)

jkrunning said...

It doesn't sound like it's Ms. Nancy he's so fond of, it's his friends and as parents, we should get used to that.

Isn't this the same kid who made a lollypop imaginary friend? See, he just likes the company, you haven't been replaced.

Patty said...

This was pretty damn funny... especially the part about you feeling guilty for not feeling guilty. Seriously laughing out loud at that one!

Don't worry, the newness of his daycare will wear off after a couple weeks... and James and his afro will shower you with kisses when you arrive to pick him up.

Cheryl said...

At least he's having fun! This is a big improvement over playing outside by himself while dad watches from the window. :-) Now go enjoy yourself and don't worry about it.

chattypatra said...

Just wait until he gets into an all out round of fisticuffs. He'll be happy to see you then!

I hope you've bought him a pair of steel-toed buster browns so he can kicks some shins. I had some and - believe you me - nobody messed with me in the playground or at the bus stop.

As a matter of fact, when I was 16, some guy called my home and asked for my brother. Then, he said, 'I know who you are! You used to kick me in the shins at the bus stop. You were mean!'

Hee. Go, James, go!

Grandma said...

thank you Amy... I needed a laugh and the "get your afro into the station wagon" did it for me.