So. I recorded my very first podcast last night with these three guys.
The whole thing seemed to turn into a forty-five minute, highly offensive laugh-fest. It was also very confusing. One of the guys had a distinctive upper-Midwest kind of drawl (you know, when they say "bage" instead of "bag?"), but I couldn't tell Vanilla apart from RazZ if four of my fingers depended on it. Like I said--very, very confusing.
Throughout the entire podcast, all three of the men seemed to defer to the good old fashioned 'ladies first' mentality. This did not work well....
1) RazZ would pose a question.
2) A short, awkward silence would follow.
3) Amy would answer the question in three words or less.
4) A long, awkward silence would follow.
I think they were all waiting for me to get to the joke. Welp, sorry boys, that was the joke.
Since last night, I've tried again and again to run the conversation through my head--you know, to figure out how just much humiliation I should prepare for--but my goodness, it's all a blur. I can only remember the following: calling some guy an "a$$ licker," saying I wanted to make out with a lady who peed her pants on purpose, something about growing boobs at age 13, and so on and so forth.
There was also some talk of camels? And doing some impromptu stretches on the office copier?
After the podcast was finished, Nitmost and Vanilla both hung up--leaving me in a somewhat awkward conversation with RazZ (Don't you just love these screen names? Very super-heroesque.). He was like, "Well Amy, that was fun. Do you want to do it again sometime?"
I think I blushed a little, like I was being asked out on a second date--you know, instead of a podcast where I'm coerced to talk about 'that time I decided to poop behind a bush.'
I said "Yes."
Apparently, this podcast will be available for free on iTunes--which, by the way, puts me on equal footing with people like Justin Timberlake and Kenny Chesney.
I'll screen it first, and if it's any good, I'll tell you how to find it. But if I'm crazy lame, and it has the potential to make me lose my street credit as a funny girl, then you'll have to forget about the whole darn thing.
And in the mean time, I think I'll stick to writing.