July 24, 2010
Here in small town New England, the landscape is dotted with those adorable little white steepled churches--just like you see in the calendars. And lately, as I've been driving around town, I've noticed all kinds of sandwich boards propped in front of those churches with the same sweet message: REGISTER FOR VACATION BIBLE SCHOOL!
Never being one to ignore a commandment from anything associated with The Divine, I graciously complied.
Now I know what you're thinking--those churches are protestant, and your family is Mormon, what the crapples, Amy?
Friends, friends, I don't care who you are, we all have a friend in Jesus. And besides, it was three hours every morning for a week. And it was free.
I'm pretty sure that Jesus supports us in our thriftiness.
And the occasionally urge to drop and run.
So James spent his week with the Methodists, and let me just say that they're lovely [old] people. Very, very kind [and old], and so incredibly sweet [and old].
Remember in the Old Testament, how 90-something year old ladies were hopping around getting pregnant? Well let me tell you, for me, Vacation Bible School really put those instances into perspective. Hats off to those elderly mothers, because I honestly have no idea how you rock a Baby Bjorn and a hunch back. Amazing.
So the basic idea of Vacation Bible School was for the kids to produce a little play. The spent the week learning songs, making props, and practicing their dance moves. All total, the play was about 25 minutes. My kid spent approximately 23 of those minutes doing this:
I'm not sure if he's getting a head rub or getting his hair pulled, but he kept on going back for more. The only time he took a break was when he decided to dance like John Tavolta in Saturday Night Fever.
Don't ask. I missed the moment. I know.
At the end of the show, for the grand finale, the little kids circled the Sanctuary in homemade cardboard race cars. I'm pretty sure they were diaper boxes--mostly because on his second lap around the church, James was like, "I'm wearing a DIAPER BOX!"
But that wasn't even close to the highlight of the show.
You want to see it? Really, do you?
Play the video below, and pay attention to the tall, blond girl's car. I think she's fifth in line:
Did you miss it? Maybe you need to watch it again?
That sweet, angelic girl circled the church three times in a race car that had a giant 666 hand painted on the side. That's right, that would be the mark of the devil.
Now why don't you go and watch it again. Sweet thing is singing her heart out in car number 666. I turned to Jared and said, "If there was actually gonna be a race, I'd definitely put my money on her. Seems like she's got connections."
If I had to guess, she's six years old, hence the number on her car. But I'm completely loving the fact that none of the kindhearted [old] Methodists had the wherewithal to redirect her artistic efforts.
I love Vacation Bible School.